TERRY SHULMAN! June 27th
HAPPY 4th of JULY!
Upcoming and Recent Events!!!
Shulman featured in article on hoarding and families In
May/June issue of Social Worker Today. See http://www.socialworktoday.com/archive/051711p14.shtml
June 2-5--Mr. Shulman presented
on compulsive theft and spending at the 2nd Annual West Coast Symposium
on Addictive Disorders in Palm Springs, California. See www.wcsad.com
Shulman will be conducting a full-day in-service on compulsive theft,
spending and hoarding at The State Bar of Michigan in Lansing, Michigan.
out our new online support group for compulsive shoppers/spenders and
hoarders. Register by going to the link: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/shoppersandspenders/
out our 1-hour employee theft online course. Learn why people commit
employee theft, how to deter it, and what to do when confronted with it.
sites in progress! www.celebrityshoplifters.com and www.celebrityshopaholics
MR. SHULMAN'S NEW BOOK RELEASE
DATE: AUGUST 1, 2011!
Shulman's 4th book Cluttered
Lives, Emply Souls: Compulsive Stealing, Spending and Hoarding
will be published by Infinity Publishing. See www.clutteredlives.com
CONFERENCE OCTOBER 1st EARLY BIRD DISCOUNT DATE: JULY 1st: $100!
The Shulman Center will conduct an
all-day conference in Detroit Saturday October 1, 2011. The Third
International Conference on Compulsive Theft, Spending and Hoarding will
cover shoplifting addiction, kleptomania, employee theft, compulsive
shopping/overspending, and hoarding/cluttering disorders. Please see
info/registration/discounts at http://www.theshulmancenter.com/conference11.htm.
of The MONTH!
Secret Lives of Hoarders by Matt Paxton (Penguin, 2011). A great book by
Mr. Paxton, an expert cleaner on A&E's "Hoarders" TV
Show. This book outlines how Mr. Paxton got into this business and he
highlights about ten different cases he's worked with. Photographs are
included. See www.cluttercleaner.com
with MONEY WORKSHOP in BOULDER, COLORADO in JULY!
Sacred Odyssey and Intimacy with Money
programs offer a weekend program for couples with 4 months of
group coaching (2x/month) at a special rate! Contact Tom Lietaert at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Mention The Shulman Center. See www.sacredodyssey.com.
My wife and
I spent three days in the Palm Springs, CA area in early June. I presented
on compulsive theft, spending and hoarding at the 2nd Annual West Coast
Symposium on Addictive Disorders. The conference attracted over 500
people from all across North America and beyond. It was mostly attended
by mental health professionals. There was plenty of sessions on drug and
alcohol abuse but this particular conference is very progressive in its
highlighting of various addictive and compulsive disorders as well as the
latest theories, statistics and hot topics. I'd highly recommend this
conference and plan on attending--and maybe presenting again--next June.
THE LESSONS of ANTHONY WEINER
By now, most if not all have heard of the
recent trials and tribulations of "former" New York Rep.
Anthony Weiner. Whatever your political or religious affiliation or your
thoughts about what constitutes infidelity, this story offers potential
lessons for us all.
First, think of a
time when you were caught doing something embarrassing. How did that
feel? Why did you do what you did? Did you really think you would get
away with it? What were the consequences? Was it worth it? What did you
learn from it? Were you hoping you wouldn't be judged?
Whether it was
getting caught shoplifting, stealing from work, hiding a purchase, or
hiding your hoarding, we're all imperfectly human: that's what makes us
such a fascinating species.
Here are some
things worth keeping in mind about the Anthony Weiner case (or any number
of the other scandals or shocking actions of those in our midst).
1. The cover-up is usually worse
than the crime. There's been speculation that if Rep. Weiner had
just admitted his actions immediately rather than denied them and sought
professional help quickly that he might have survived this ordeal without
having to resign. But when we lie on top of being exposed, it makes
things infinitely more difficult. Very few people survive this
(though there are exceptions).
2. People never cease to amaze at
what we're capable of. In this world of increased
risk-taking and technological advances, it's hard to believe anybody can
be shocked anymore by anything; yet, it happens.
3. It's not about sex, it's about
Just as sexual assault, harassment and rape are not about sex but about
power, most psychologists who've been interviewed about the Weiner matter
theorize that it was narcissism not sex that compelled Rep. Weiner to
engage in his risky and destructive behavior. The need for constant
adulation appears to be increasing in our world. Rep. Weiner even refused
at first to leave his high-profile job, likely for both financial and
prestige reasons. Sometimes we have to lose a lot to find out who we
4. Judge not lest you be judged. While we have to right to judge
a person's actions and have opinions about the rightness or wrongness of
them, it's better to focus on one's apparent lack of judgment than to
judge that person through and through. Who among us has never exhibited
5. Public officials are and should
be held to a higher standard. It's been said that here in
America we hold our public figures to much too high moral and personal
standards compared to other countries. And, yet, we are also becoming
very cynical, too. Politicians, actors, entertainers and others in the
public eye are just human beings like all of us. Whether it's Hugh Grant
cheating on his fiancee Elizabeth Hurley with a transvestite prostitute
or Winona Ryder shoplifting from Saks Fifth Avenue, people are people. In
fact, one could say that the pressures of being a public official or
celebrity weigh heavily on such folks and make it more surprising when
they don't succumb to scandal. Yet, when public officials run for
election on traits of honesty, integrity, and good judgment, we do have
the right to hold them to high standards.
6. It's best to leave work when in
a severe crisis and focus on getting well. As stated earlier, when in
crisis, it's often best to take a break to re-center oneself. Being in
the midst of a media circus is distracting for others and makes it quite
a bit harder for us to focus on ourselves and our loved ones.
7. What doesn't kill us, hopefully
will make us stronger. If we look at how many people
fall from grace and manage to come back and reinvent themselves or
reclaim some modicum of respect--Bill Clinton, Eliot Spitzer, Robert
Downey, Jr., even Richard Nixon--this should tell us that as much as we
often root for the downfall of others, we tend to admire and be inspired
by those who "rise from the ashes." Americans, especially, love
a comeback story. And who among us hasn't learned and grown from our own
mistakes and misfortunes. This is what recovery is all about.
So, I hope Rep.
Weiner gets the help he needs and deserves as a human being. Time will
tell. Let us remember this saying: "there's a little Weiner in all
Why Would a Socialite
Steal? by Ann Binlot June 15, 2011
yesterday, New York socialite
Beata Boman was most famous for
receiving an affectionate kiss in St. Tropez from Prince Andrew, according to the Daily Mail.
But that all changed when Boman was arrested
for stealing a $11,500 scarf from
upscale store Richards of Greenwich in Greenwich, Connecticut,
Polish-born beauty was nabbed by police after a security guard followed
her out of the store and alerted them to her location. Police told the AP
that she admitted taking the scarf and that she had planned to return it.
Boman follows in the illustrious footsteps of Lindsay
and Winona Ryder, who were both arrested
for shoplifting even though they had the means to pay for the items they
stole. What could possibly bring the socialite, who describes herself in her Facebook profile as a "former
model" and fashion designer, to steal?